Seriously, Dude

 

This morning's conversation with my 4-year old centered around what constitutes being a "Dude." With a minimal amount of protestation, he was convinced that "Real Dudes" brush their teeth, wear warm jackets, clean up their messes, and help their little sister get ready for school. 

Dude...did I miss something here? Should I be pursuing a career in politics???

 

Pregnancy, The Movie. Pregnancy, the Sequel. Roll Credits!

A couple of my friends are having babies.

They're at the stage where they just can't imagine getting any bigger, or how in God's name their skin could possibly stretch any further without bursting like a ripe melon.

Trust me, I know.

Both my kids decided to come 9 days post-due date.

It DOES feel humanly impossible to get any larger.

But you DO.

And it doesn't even get you into the Guiness Book of World Records.

I honestly thought I'd be pregnant forever. Haul those little buggers around for the next couple decades. Because when you're 9 months pregnant and past your due date, every day feels like several years.


I thought they'd just hang around being fed and watered, pop a hand out for their college degree and social security check, and that's that. Early retirement while Mom does all the work.

Don't worry, friends. They will come out sooner or later. In the meantime...

Make peace with stretch marks.